<!DOCTYPE html>
<html>
<head>
<meta charset="UTF-8">
<title>Oblivious by ochotonidae</title>
<style type="text/css">

body { background-color: #ffffff; }
.CI {
text-align:center;
margin-top:0px;
margin-bottom:0px;
padding:0px;
}
.center   {text-align: center;}
.cover    {text-align: center;}
.full     {width: 100%; }
.quarter  {width: 25%; }
.smcap    {font-variant: small-caps;}
.u        {text-decoration: underline;}
.bold     {font-weight: bold;}
</style>
</head>
<body>
<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/26020342">Oblivious</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/ochotonidae/pseuds/ochotonidae'>ochotonidae</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Sanders Sides (Web Series)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Alternate Universe - Canon, M/M, Mild Hurt/Comfort, Not Beta Read, Pining, Self-Esteem Issues, Swearing, but they get together in the end - Freeform, they're both oblivious idiots</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-08-21</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-08-21</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-06 06:08:11</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Not Rated</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>1,539</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/26020342</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/ochotonidae/pseuds/ochotonidae</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Yet Roman seemed oblivious. Janus supposed he was glad for that, because he didn’t particularly fancy facing the crushing feeling of despair as Roman rejected him. Despite Logan’s advice, he was perfectly content just living with it until everything fell apart.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Creativity | Roman "Princey" Sanders/Deceit | Janus Sanders</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>13</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>101</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>Oblivious</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>This was written in a couple hours and decidedly not edited, sorry if it's bad.</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>The night had been a blur, but somehow, Janus had found himself alone with Roman at midnight, watching Hamilton. And he was freaking out.</p><p>Roman’s arm was draped around his shoulders, and they shared a blanket. He was rapping along with the movie, eyes shining with excitement. Janus couldn’t help but stare at him.</p><p> </p><p>It had just started with an apology. The fallout from the wedding had affected everyone, and Janus had said some things that he regretted. So he apologized. Simple. Roman had accepted it and Janus was content.</p><p>Soon after, he noticed that Roman was acting almost friendly. He’d greet Janus when they passed each other, and chat with him while they waited for the coffee to brew. </p><p>The first time Roman had invited Janus into the Imagination, he’d been floored. A small voice in the back of his mind even told him that Roman was going to take his revenge, but he pushed it away, if only out of pure curiosity. They ended up helping the townspeople with a gryphon problem, and then watched the sunset from a small garden Roman had created. Janus began to consider the prospect of Roman more than tolerating him.</p><p>He’d started to notice things, little quirks about Roman. The way he stuck his tongue out when he concentrated, how he hummed Panic! at the Disco songs when he cleaned, how he could get so easily sidetracked by just the mention of a musical. Janus just found them all the more endearing, and couldn’t help his smile when Roman grinned.</p><p>The day he knew was the anniversary of when Virgil had left. It was almost five am, and Janus was huddled in his room, holding back tears. Sure, he knew that Virgil was fine, and everything was okay, but he couldn’t stop the thoughts that swirled through his head, telling him that it was his fault, he hurt Virgil enough for the side to leave, he should just go and-</p><p>Roman had interrupted with a knock. Janus tried to respond, but all that came out was a strangled sob. The door had creaked open, and almost instantly, arms were circled around him, giving him a warmth that he had been sorely lacking. Roman had rocked him gently, back and forth until Janus felt his eyes slipping shut. He’d woken up in his bed, and Roman didn’t mention it at breakfast.</p><p>That morning, Janus realized. He was in love with Roman.</p><p>Knowing it didn’t help, with the side sending butterflies through his stomach every time he laughed. Every fleeting touch by Roman left Janus blushing, and on multiple occasions, Virgil had poked fun at him about it.</p><p>He’d tried to avoid contact, hoping it would just go away within time, because who would love the villain? But it hadn’t worked. Roman had come knocking before the day was even over, and he’d dragged Janus out to watch The Good Place with him. And Janus couldn’t say no to his pleading eyes.</p><p>So Janus had accepted that he would be stuck like this, this cycle of the universe cruelly giving him a thread of hope only to snatch it away in the next moment. After all, why would Roman like somebody like him? He was evil, a villain. He was a snake, who’d act nice one second and stab you in the back the next. He could easily eliminate any one of the sides he deemed useless and take their place, and the others would be none the wiser. All he would do is hurt Roman, and he’d already done enough of that.</p><p>It had gotten to the point where Janus would turn red when Roman talked to him. His palms would get sweaty, and his heart would turn backflips at every smile. Even Logan had picked up on it, approaching him and advising him to tell Roman. Remus had given his blessing, in his own weird way; he’d popped up in front of Janus and told him ‘You can fuck him, but don’t tell me about it.’ before disappearing.</p><p>Yet Roman seemed oblivious. Janus supposed he was glad for that, because he didn’t particularly fancy facing the crushing feeling of despair as Roman rejected him. Despite Logan’s advice, he was perfectly content just living with it until everything fell apart.</p><p> </p><p>And now, he was pressed against Roman’s body, warmth radiating off the side. His eyes were bright, but Janus detected a hint of anxiety throwing him off.<br/>
Suddenly, Roman picked up the remote as the intermission started, and paused the film.</p><p>Janus felt a spike of fear run through him as the side tugged him even closer. He tried to make his breathing quieter as it sped up, and he felt his chest getting tighter.</p><p>“Can I tell you about something?” Janus nodded thickly, chewing on his lip. Roman sighed, a sweet smile gracing his features.</p><p>“I have a crush.” Oh. Janus knew it was bound to happen, but his heart still shattered at the words. In his wildest fantasies, maybe he’d’ve been able to love Roman, but this was real life. Roman liked somebody else, and Janus was going to support him, even if those four words felt like a stake through his heart.</p><p>“He’s so beautiful. He doesn’t laugh often, but when he does, it’s like music.” Roman grinned. Logan? Or maybe Virgil. </p><p>“He’s so smart, and he gets excited when he talks about things he likes. I can barely keep up, but he just explains it again.” Logan. </p><p>“He’s witty and sarcastic, but he has a soft side that he doesn’t like anyone to see.” Roman took Janus’s hand and fiddled with it idly. But that described Virgil. </p><p>“He looks so fucking beautiful at all times. His smile lights up the night sky. His eyes shine brighter than a thousand moons. His voice is like a lark’s, sweet and melodic.” That could be any of them.</p><p>“He always knows exactly how to cheer me up whenever I’m down.” That was Patton. Janus frowned lightly, confused.</p><p>“One time, I made him a flower crown, and he wore it until it wilted.” Roman was tracing hearts into his palm now. He’d given Janus a flower crown a while back, but it couldn’t be him. He must have just missed when that happened.</p><p>“He kept the bracelet I made for him when we were kids.” Patton was the only one who openly displayed his bracelets, but Janus knew some were hidden under Virgil’s sleeve, and Logan tied them around his ankle.</p><p>“He takes a rock from the beach every time I take him to the Imagination, and he keeps them on a shelf in his room.” Janus’s immediate thoughts flickered to the mahogany shelf immediately opposite his own door, but quickly dispelled the idea. It was probably Patton.</p><p>“I love him so, so much.” Roman sighed, lovestruck. Janus felt his chest twist at that, and turned his face away.</p><p>A soft chuckle echoed from behind him, and Roman pulled him back so that they were face to face.</p><p>“And he’s so oblivious.” he smiled fondly. Janus felt his cheeks go red at the love in Roman’s eyes, but he reminded himself it wasn’t for him.</p><p>“Then you should confess to him.” he said, feeling his breath pick up as Roman’s hand entwined with his own. </p><p>“Yeah,” Roman agreed. “What do you think he’ll say?” Janus felt a twinge of something white-hot in his gut.</p><p>“Maybe if you told me who it was, I could tell you!” he snapped, pulling away. A moment passed, guilt settling in his stomach when a hand tangled in his hair, scratching his head gently.</p><p>“Janus,” Roman started, voice soft and sweet. Janus almost wished he’d just get it over with, so he could give him an appropriate response and then escape to his room to break down.</p><p>“It’s you.” the words rang through his skull. No, he must have misunderstood. Janus blinked up at Roman, confusion etched into his face. “You. I love you.” Roman smiled.</p><p>“N-no. No, you don’t.” Janus frowned. “I… Yes? I do?” he furrowed his eyebrows. “No, you can’t love me. I’m evil. I’m the villain. I’m bad. You- you deserve someone better.” Janus backed away.</p><p>“Wh- why would you ever love me?” he whispered. Roman flinched like he’d been slapped.</p><p>“Why would I love you?” he repeated quietly. “Janus… why would I not? You’re perfect.” he offered a hand. Janus didn’t take it, pinching himself. “I’m not dreaming,” he murmured.</p><p>Roman nodded. “You’re not.” Tears pricked Janus’s eyes, and he turned away before the dam broke.</p><p>His body shook with the force of his sobs, and arms pulled him into a warm embrace. Roman whispered quiet reassurances into his ear, stroking his back encouragingly.<br/>
Janus turned, launching into Roman’s chest. “I love you too.” he mumbled, not missing the side’s fistpump. He laughed, rubbing at his eyes.</p><p>“God, I’m such an idiot.” he chuckled. Roman nodded, a wide grin on his face. “So are you,” Janus poked him in the chest. “I thought I’d have been discovered a couple months ago.”</p><p>Roman pulled him close, sighing. “I guess we’re both oblivious idiots.” </p><p>“Yeah. But I still love you.”</p><p>“I love you too.”</p>
  </div></div>
</body>
</html>